Most random night ever!
Ever feel like some things, or combination of things could only happen to you? (or maybe you think only these things could happen to me!)
In the space of 24hrs, I went from having no plans on valentines day… to working a chocolate fountain at a big gay swedish/irish wedding… complete with gaydar FM dj… and an award winning drag act… at Madam Tussauds in London!
Throughout the course of the evening, I kept finding myself thinking… Is this how I thought my life would turn out?!?
The bad bits:
Driving a transit van into central London at rushhour - not fun.
Having to parallel park said transit van 4 times between expensive looking cars - nervewracking… as its only my second time driving that big a van, still I reckon I’ve got it mastered now.
The weather! God-damnit… Torrential rain + harsh gusts that nearly blew me off the road, is not fun, especially at 2am… Is THIS how I thought my life would turn out? 29 years old, been on my own all valentines afternoon and evening, driving home to an empty bed.
Hmmm.
Still, what an experience the wedding was! The couple had won a prize from “big gay weddings” (I’m guessing what this company does… can you?!) which included a wedding cake made by the people who made madonna + guy richies, the craziest drag act I’ve ever seen… words couldn’t even begin to explain! Food from some 5* chef, a chocolate fountain (duuuh) and the venue of Madam Tussauds ballroom.
The speeches… christ alive, they should have a show on the comedy channel!
I knew it wasn’t going to be the usual speeches, by a scan around the (shall we say) obvious flamboyance of the guests…
Anyway, the mother of the bride (Yes… Alan was called the bride all night!) started preceedings with a reference to her son coming home and telling her about this great man she’d met “I knew he was special when Alan told me he’d met a fabulous man who’d given him some handcream for his flaky skin…” and it went downhill from there!
I learnt a few things:
1) Swedish weddings have a tradition whereby anyone who wants to speak does (the speeches went on till 1030!)
2) Irish people (well quite a few) can ACTUALLY dance like riverdance
3) The chocolate admiration heirarchy is not: Women > Children > Men as I previously thought… it is Gay men > Women > Children > Men!
4) Transit vans “turn in” to corners, so always go in backwards to parallel park!
5) Richard Branson is quite a short arse! (well his waxwork is anyway)
6) I’d be a lot more bored/lonely without my mobile and friends to keep me sane.
Is this the way I want my life to turn out?
Rich in experiences, varied and chaotic… often working weird, lonely hours… I guess so.
